inspiring joy filled living
Why Do I Feel Overwhelmed All The Time?
April 9, 2026
(And What Actually Helps)
There’s a question that quietly runs in the background of so many of our days:
Why do we feel overwhelmed all the time?
Whether you’re a brand new mama trying to keep track of feedings and diapers, a mom with busy toddlers who are constantly protesting naptime, or a mom juggling school age kids and the maze of actvities and sports, there are a ton of reasonss to feel overwhelmed.
And not just on the busy days or when something big happens.
But on regular, ordinary days…
when nothing is technically “wrong,”
and yet everything feels like a lot.
We Can’t Turn Our Brains Off
Even when we sit down…
even when the house is quiet…
Our minds keep going.
Running through the to-do list.
Mentally adding to the grocery list.
Thinking about what’s next… and next… and next.
It feels like there’s a constant list (or many lists!) in the background.
And no matter how much gets done…
It never feels finished.
The Feeling of Always Being Behind
And underneath all of that…
There’s this quiet, persistent thought:
👉 I should be further along than I am.
More on top of things.
Less scattered.
More caught up.
Like somehow we’re just slightly behind in our own lives.
Even when we’re doing a lot.
Even when we’re showing up.
What If Nothing Has Gone Wrong?
For a long time, we assume this means:
- We need to be more organized
- More disciplined
- Better at managing everything
But what if that’s not the problem?
What if the truth is simpler…
👉 We’re carrying more than we were meant to hold all at once.
Not because we’re doing life wrong—
But because we care about a lot.
The Invisible Load
Overwhelm isn’t just about what we’re doing.
It’s about what we’re carrying.
The mental tabs that never close:
The decisions waiting to be made
The people we care about
The responsibilities we’re holding
The expectations we’re trying to meet
It’s not just a to-do list.
It’s a constant awareness of everything that still needs us.
When You Can’t Take Anything Off Your Plate
And then there are seasons when…
👉 Nothing can come off your plate.
Everything matters.
Everything feels necessary.
And it all feels like too much.
Those are the moments that feel the heaviest.
And I’m learning that in those moments, it’s not about fixing everything…
It’s about walking yourself through it differently.
Sometimes that looks like:
- Reminding yourself: this will pass
- Asking your kids to help (even if it’s not perfect)
- Adjusting your expectations—especially for yourself
And most importantly…
👉 Choosing what matters most in this season
…and letting the rest soften around it.
Not forever.
But enough to breathe.
A Better Way to Move Through It
We don’t need a complete life overhaul.
We need a few small ways to support ourselves inside real life.
Here are a few that actually help:
👉 Step outside—even for a few minutes
Fresh air. Sunlight. A pause.
It won’t fix everything—
but it can gently take the edge off the overwhelm and give your mind a little space to breathe.
👉 Take the shortcut
We don’t get extra credit for doing everything the hardest way.
A simple meal is better than nothing.
Protect your energy like it matters—because it does.
👉 Give yourself grace
You don’t have to carry everything alone to do it well.
Even imperfect help… helps.
When my kids were really little, my husband worked long days and a lot of late nights. And for a while, I felt like I had to hold everything together on my own.
But eventually, I started inviting my girls into it.
They would “help” fold laundry (or more accurately, shove it into their drawers), sweep the floors, and water the plants… and sometimes themselves right along with them.
It wasn’t efficient. It wasn’t perfect.
But it was enough.
And over time, something really beautiful happened. As they grew and became more capable, our home started to feel less like something I had to manage alone—and more like a team effort. Everyone pitching in. Everyone contributing.
And maybe that’s the reminder we need sometimes:
it doesn’t have to be perfect to be good.
I wish I could say I did that well. Looking back, I can remember feeling so much pressure and guilt.
Throughout those baby years especially, my type A personality made it hard to let go. I had this idea in my head of what kind of mom I would be, how my house would look, the beautiful meals I would cook, the educational activities I would effortlessly do with my kids. And then I actually had kids!
The truth is, life isn’t wrapped up in a beautiful Pinterest worthy bow. It is messy and complicated. There are meltdowns, blowouts (usually at the same time!), cranky kids who won’t nap or eat, and it is in those moments that motherhood teaches how little we can control. Being a parent is all about being flexible and ready for almost anything, including an epic toddler bloody nose while waiting in the pick up line for my elementary school kids. That’s a story for another day!
One of the biggest lessons I learned in those early years was: simple is best. My kids didn’t need a three course meal (if we are being honest, they preferred frozen boxed pizza with a side of fruit snacks!), and one of the things I had to let go of was cooking detailed meals. My kids didn’t want them, I didn’t have time, and it was so much work to then have to clean up. My only rule became you had a eat a vegetable alongside that frozen pizza.
Or a staple for YEARS: quesadillas and apple slices with a side of baby carrots. Everyone ate, everyone was happy. My motto in those little years was fed, bath, bed. Rinse and repeat. Looking back, those tiny wins are what saved my sanity. And sometimes it’s ok to let them watch two movies in a row, eat cookies before dinner, and skip a bath in a favor of running through the sprinklers. This is definitely speaking from experience! Those might end of being some of their favorite memories.
And now, standing on the edge of having two kids in high school, I feel that truth in a way I never fully understood before. I’ve seen it—how quickly it all moves. How the seasons change before you’re quite ready for them to.
But here’s what I’m learning, and what I want to hold onto:
the most meaningful moments with our kids don’t happen in the big, planned milestones.
They happen in the ordinary.
In the moments we almost overlook—
a toddler’s sticky kiss,
a baby’s quiet smile,
a middle schooler lingering a little longer in the kitchen,
a car ride home from practice when conversation just… opens up.
That’s where the magic lives.
And more often than not, we only catch it if we’re there for it—really there.
It has taken me nearly sixteen years of motherhood to understand this in a deeper way:
the greatest gift we can give our kids—and ourselves—is our presence.
Not perfection.
Not a perfectly clean house or a perfectly executed plan.
Just us.
👉 Let “enough” be enough
Not everything needs your full energy.
Some days:
- Good enough is enough
- Done is enough
- Simple is enough
👉 Choose what you care about most
You can care about a lot of things.
But you don’t have to carry them all equally, all the time.
The best strategy I have used to cut through the noise is asking myself, what is going to matter 5 years from now? When life feels very stressful, that simple question has helped me refocus how I want to best spend my time.
A Different Way to See Overwhelm
What if overwhelm isn’t telling us:
👉 “Do more”
What if it’s telling us:
👉 “Care differently. Carry it differently.”
Because the truth is—
We don’t feel overwhelmed because we don’t care.
We feel overwhelmed because we care about a lot.
And that’s not something to fix.
That’s something to lead well.
A Small Step for Today
Let’s keep this simple:
Step outside for a few minutes.
Let one thing be easier.
Choose what matters most today.
Give yourself a little more grace and kindness.
We don’t need a completely different life.
We just need a better way to move through the one we already have.
I didn’t fully understand this until I lost my dad to cancer almost four years ago.
There was something about that season that brought everything into focus. A quiet, steady reminder that life isn’t made up of big, highly orchestrated moments—it’s a series of small ones, strung together. And the more present we are, the more of those moments we actually get to keep.
Overwhelm is real.
The flurry of life is real.
And it can pull us so quickly into rushing, fixing, managing, and trying to keep up with everything all at once.
But maybe today isn’t about keeping up.
Maybe it’s about coming back.
Back to this moment.
Back to what actually matters.
Back to the people right in front of you.
You don’t have to solve everything today.
You don’t have to do it all perfectly.
Just take one small step.
Breathe.
Step outside.
Let something be enough.
Because this day—this ordinary, full, imperfect day—
is your life.
And it’s worth being here for.
If this resonated, I’d love to stay connected.
I send out “Love Notes”—simple, encouraging emails for women building full lives in real time.
No pressure. Just something to come back to when you need it.
With Love,
Jen
